Negativity Jiu-Jitsu
I like to think that most people are positive, collaborative, and constructive.
But sometimes people have bad days. And sometimes people just suck.
Occasionally we find ourselves in a position where the person we need to work with is negative.
This can be a jarring experience.
These encounters also set off your fight-or-flight instincts – neither of which will do you any favors.
After years of awkward encounters, I developed a simple technique that effectively diffuses these situations.
It’s called “Negativity Jiu-Jitsu”.
I know nothing of martial arts or Jiu-Jitsu.
The one thing I do know is that at its core is a philosophy to use an opponent’s force against themselves.
Instead of mounting your own attack, you channel their own energy to achieve your goals.
If you don’t see why it’s a bad idea to counterattack in the business world:
If you ignore the negative framing, there is still raw material that you can work in most toxic interactions.
The trick is converting that raw material into something more productive.
The technique for Negativity Jiu-Jitsu is simple.
What are they really trying to say?
Reframe what they’ve offered in a more constructive light.
Share what you heard, and get them to build on it in a productive way.
Using these steps you can turn even the most painful interaction into a useful conversation.
Here are some examples to bring it to life:
It’s a simple technique, but if you are well-practiced you can make the best out of even the worst meetings, and not have to compromise on your values to get there!
Could your network benefit from this technique? Share below!
